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Five years later

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And here I am again in 2025. It’s hard to believe how quickly time has passed, last post was in 2020, but it feels like both yesterday and a lifetime ago. So much has happened since then. The world changed, and so did I. I lost people I loved,family, friends, some suddenly, some slowly. COVID didn’t just take lives; it left behind silence, empty spaces at the table, and a heaviness that’s hard to explain unless you’ve felt it too. I miss them more than words can hold. Sometimes, out of nowhere, the memories come flooding in, and the tears follow. And I let them. Because grief, I’ve learned, is love that has nowhere else to go. Life feels quieter now. Not empty, but different. I don’t rush like I used to. I don’t argue like I used to. My approach to things has softened—mellowed with time, with experience, with loss. Grief has changed me, but so has love. So has time. And maybe that’s okay. To those I’ve lost, I carry you with me. To those still here, I see you more clearly now. T...
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Bahasa Melano Balingian

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My trip to Miri not only gave me the opportunity to reunite with old friends that I missed dearly but I also took the golden opportunity to learn more about my dad's language. My dad is a Melanau from Kpg Suyong, Balingian. Their melanau dialect differs from the rest of the Melanau dialects from Mukah, Oya, Rejang, Dalat, Matu, Igan & Bintulu. Sad to say that this particular dialect is slowly disappearing. Even my aunt Regina or fondly known as Usu Ina who is married to a melanau from Bintulu is at loss with her own Balingian dialect at times. So far, I've noticed that only my dad, my first cousins Lai & Kak Senah are still speaking this beautiful dialect fluently. Usu Ina converse mostly in the Mukah dialect and I observed that she would refer to Lai if she was not sure of the language itself. My dad and his siblings back in Balingian still converse in their own dialect but once they are out of their kampung, they would converse in the Mukah dialect again. Mmmmmmmmmmm....
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